How she overcame Anxiety
Not to long ago I fulfilled one of my childhood dreams of having my own horse. We went and got two which ended up as not the ideal experience. When we arrived to this farm I road a few horses using my basic knowledge and confidence of riding a horse. Meaning I have only rode a couple horses and only one time by myself with out someone holding the lead probably about 12 years prior. I obviously was a beginner but went there with confidence. Their was a misunderstanding about the horses and the horse I was on (which is my current horse) got spooked and ran at full speed straight toward my husband, the seller, and a gate. I panicked. In that moment I thought, "she is going to jump the fence, run into the people in front of us, or stop after going full speed and I am going to fly into or over the fence". So once my fight or flight kicked in, I decided to jump off of the horse running full speed. I have never hit the ground so hard in my life. I hurt my knees pretty bad, and my arm, and I was pretty sore all over. I had scrapes and bruises on my arms and legs. BUT, I was alive, I didn't break any bones, and I was entirely embarrassed.
I then got up, severely in pain, looked at the lady selling the horses and acted like I was entirely fine, when I just wanted to hug my husband and cry. I told her I would try again. Why? I figured if I don't face my fear now, I never will. Long story short, I ended up buying this beautiful doe eyed horse. I knew there was such a sweetness to her but may have just not felt it in that moment. But I wanted to give her a chance and assume her freaking out was just a misunderstanding.
Once we got home I rode the other horse with confidence but I felt so unconfident on this specific horse I had an incident with. I let fear take hold of me. Each time I rode her which was probably twice in that year I did it on a lead and was terrified and I knew she felt that. Finally we decided to take her to training for a month. Once I picked her up and talking to the trainer I realised it was not her that was the issue, it was me. She was responding to my strong emotion of anxiety for her, that when we attempted to ride her she was also anxious and nervous.
Yesterday I finally overcame my anxiety. I began my training lesson on her, honestly so afraid that I was contemplating getting rid of her. I was tense, panicked something unexpected would happen, and just trying to focus on relaxing. I focused on deep breathing, controlling her, and showing her my confidence so she could feel confident. I walked her very slow around the arena. Once I was finished my kiddos got to ride her for a while, and she did amazing. Once I saw that she wasn't as scary as I made her out to be, I felt more calm.
Remember that sweetness I told you I felt about her? The trainer said "She loves kids", my heart immediately melted. I knew there was something special about her. I just needed to figure her out. I believe based off her spookiness that she also had a lot of things to overcome. She came from an auction, then went to a dealer, and she also likely has some fear and trust issues she is working through. But together I believe we will make a great bond.
By the end of our training session, I rode her with confidence in a gallop. And I plan to try to ride her again as I have gained more knowledge in what to do if things go wrong. I do believe the sense of having control makes me feel more calm. Like if I knew how to control her when she freaks out then I would feel more calm riding her. But not knowing how to correct it, is a scary feeling. This is where we likely go wrong. Maybe us feeling like we need to always be in control for a sense of security, instead of finding that security in God and giving him all of the control? When its not a burden we have to carry, why carry it?
Anxiety is something so hard to overcome. Sometimes you just have to give it up and hand it over to God. This feeling is just a feeling, and we are in charge of the way we feel. So if we choose to retrain our brain and overcome it, we will. However, its easier said than done.
Some things that help me overcome being anxious is to analyze it with some questions to myself like:
Why do I feel anxious, fearful, afraid, etc?
Is it a valid concern?
Did something cause this feeling?
How can I calm myself down? (I also practice in the moment typically with deep breathing)
Can I choose to overcome this or will I allow it to consume me?
Once I can figure out why I have this emotion, then I can evaluate it and try to overcome it. One of the best ways I have found to overcome anxiety, fear or any unwanted emotions is to lean into God and just give it to him. Knowing that God knows the beginning and the end, he knows the day I was born and the day I will die, and he has control of my whole life. This allows me to calm down and not focus on being so negative. Anxiety is a negative emotion. It doesn't make me feel good, or happy, it makes me feel stressed, tense and my chest heavy. So once I can hand that over and say "This will not affect me any longer, I am not going to be afraid/anxious anymore, I know God has me." Then I begin to feel a lightness, like a load lifted off my chest.
It is important to recognise anxiety for as it is. Analyse why you feel this way and make a plan to overcome it. Whether it's by facing the anxiety trigger straight on, or slowly working your way there mentally till you can physically get there.
Here are some great verses that help me.
Philippians 4:6-7 (NKJV) “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”
Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”
I would like to say this was my first time experiencing anxiety but that would be laughable. I am a Mom of five. I picture the worst of the worse happening to everyone all the time. I stress myself out. I used to be so anxiety ridden that it was hard to enjoy life. I let it consume me before, but never again. I was so fearful that I wouldn't even allow other people to drive my kids around, or for our family to swim in the ocean. Anything I felt was high risk was a big no. But after giving these fears that are out of my control to God I feel so much better. Now I don't stress when my kids drive in the car with people, and we just recently swam in the ocean (even though I was on high alert still LOL). But its important to remember that if we consume ourselves with anxiety for all the things out of our control we will drive ourselves crazy.
Emotions and Organs (TCM)
It's also important to remember that emotions are connected to specific organs. For example in TCM they believe that the kidney and adrenals are connected to the emotion fear/anxiety. Our kidney is responsible for removing excess waste and fluid that makes urine. Our adrenals make hormones that help regulate your immune system, metabolism, blood pressure, response to stress and other necessary functions. Two very important organs connected to two very common emotions.
When one of these organs are not functioning correctly due to your emotions, or your emotions are out of whack because of your organ not functioning correctly their is an imbalance. Disease whether mental or emotional is the cause of an imbalance in your body. So in order for you to stay healthy mentally, emotionally, and physically longterm then you need to take care of your body by supporting it with the foundations of health. Everyday eat real food, exercise, get sunlight, fresh air, drink plenty of water, rest, etc and follow the foundations of health to keep your body into balance. This is the BEST way to keep those unwanted emotions in check.
Here are some more tips to help you overcome anxiety:
Exercise (stay active)
Limit caffeine
Avoid alcohol
Try to quit smoking
Make an effort to rest and get a good nights sleep
Mindfullness
Diffuse essential oils: Lavender, Grapefruit, Chamomile, Clary Sage
Drink Chamomile or Chamomile/Lavender tea
Deep breathing exercises
Journaling
Support your kidneys and adrenals by eating nutrient dense food
Additional supplements: Kava root, vitamin B complex, Magnesium, omega 3 fatty acids, CBD oil.
References:
Axe J. 2023, March 5. Anxiety Natural Remedies: 15 Ways to Relax & Find Calm. Retrieved on August 30, 2023 from: https://draxe.com/health/natural-remedies-anxiety/
Kapil, J. 2022, August 10. 15 Natural Remedies for Anxiety. Retrieved on August 30, 2023 from: https://khealth.com/learn/anxiety/natural-remedies/
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